I can't believe I'm in my 9th week in South Korea. I am very much still in the adjustment phase, but I'm steadily becoming more acclimated.
I am also approaching my 28th birthday. This past year has been so full. It's hard to believe this time last year I was in the process of uprooting from Atlanta, where I lived for three years. As settled as I was, I wasn't content. I knew like everything else, Atlanta was temporary. I've had this urge to live overseas, so I knew before life really hit me (kids & husband) I needed to create this idea for myself. From Atlanta, I moved back to New Mexico for a few months to prepare for my big move. As reluctant as I was to spend months back home, it was needed. Upon arriving home, I quickly learned how much I have changed since I went off to college in 2005 . I also noticed how much my hometown stayed the same. Good & bad. Graduating from an HBCU, visiting Africa twice, and living in city known for its' blackness; I grew within black culture. Those experiences evolved my perspective and helped shed some of the lies I had been taught growing up. I can stand taller in the truth and beauty of what it means to be a black girl in America. I guess what I'm trying to carefully say is, coming home with my new perspective admist all of the mainstream uproar on racism, police brutality and respectability politics- I got to see my town, my America in a different light. It wasn't all bad. Actually, it was mostly love. I reconnected with a lot of family, and most importantly I got to spend time with my mother. I took every chance I got to travel. I visited college friends, went to music festivals, explored Texas, listened to Angela Davis speak, and fell in love with New Orleans. To top it all off, I fell in love with a remarkable man, who happens to be from my hometown. Talk about life coming full circle! It's fair to say 27 has been quite a year. I won't omit the fact that I had my dealings with the growing pains, heartbreak, confusion, and all the other ever-changing emotions the mid-twenties bring. It's not all fun. It's not easy, but you keep going.
back to South Korea
I wasn't able to sleep much on my 14 hour flight here. I was waiting on the fact that I was really relocating abroad to settle in, 9 weeks into my move.. I'm still not sure it has sunk in. Nonetheless, I'm here.
So far, my experience in South Korea has been love. The people are gentle, the food is good, and the land is insanely beautiful. Unless you are in a touristy city like Seoul or Busan, there is not much diversity. I live in a smaller town. Luckily, it is in proximity to beautiful temples, beaches and nearby cities. I have my days where I ask myself what the hell I'm doing?, but I am growing to love my new life.
"Wherever you go, there you are."
My friend, Ashley, mentioned that quote to me. It's true. You cannot use places, people or anything as an escape. As liberating as traveling is, I know wherever I land.. I will be met with myself. All of myself. The parts I love and the parts I'm still growing to love. It always humbles me.
27 has been loaded with lessons. Once again, manifestation has proven itself to be real. I also understand seasons more. I get the importance of gracefully enduring the growth process, while being mindful that your season is coming. I get why all the philosophers rave about 'being present' and being 'in the now.' Life is fleeting. It's important to be one with time, instead of always chasing it. I know ceasing the moment doesn't always come easy, but when I feel myself going too fast or becoming too hard, I know I must slow myself down- get on my knees, sit in indian style, or open up my journal and send up gratitude prayers. I'm learning that I need to be less guarded. I know how important I am. I know that what troubles me, must be spoken. I know how important it is to intentionally and wisely choose my emotions. I know truth-seeking is tiring, but necessary. I know that when you face a fear, you become a little more free. I can go on, but my eyelids are getting heavy and I have a feeling I may be rambling. xoxo
I love you to peace,
Ebony
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